THE JOURNEY.......... (based on true story from my diary)

 

image by the guardian.com

It was around 7:59 pm when I was running on the platform to catch the train. My throat had dried out, I could not speak and my legs were tired. But I continued matching every minute of the giant vintage watch on the railway station. I landed at the door of my coach at sharp 8 pm. A sigh..... "Is this B2?" I asked a man with a kid.

"Yes " he said

"This is xyz train, right? "

"Yes, yes, don't wry."

"Okay, thank you so much"

 I stepped in with my luggage completely drenched in northern summer. In the compartment, everyone was staring at me- an old couple, a young lady and a married female in her 40s.

"Give her space she is tired." said some voice.

I ignored every look and kept breathing. Some people from other compartments were eager to know my whereabout as if coming late to the train was a crime. While others sympathised with me and said- "bechari ..ladki.."

 Never mind. I emptied my water bottle by gulping every drop in one single sip. I sat on the vacant place. The man who was standing outside, came back in. He belonged to the same compartment as of mine.

"Ac is not working. You sit comfortably. You seem tired." said the man

"No, I am fine."

I closed my eyes and recalled the last fourteen minutes of my struggle to catch the train. It made me forget everything. I am an overthinker, I accept it. There is not a moment when I don't think or plan or prospect or feel or analyse. But those fourteen minutes made me forget everything..my happy moments, sad moments, family, friends, people, life and even my identity. In those very moments, I just ran for myself. I could feel the value of every second and every minute.

Suddenly a kick broke my thought....

 I looked by my side. A barely three years old dashing (yes, he was. I had never been charmed by a male personality before this) child kicked me while watching some cartoon in his android. His hair was silky and wavy. He had a whitish complexion and skinny body with a cute face. I smiled at him and closed my eyes again. Yet another kick...

There is a NO silence zone in INDIAN TRAINS. You can never find peace there, even if you want it so badly. I decided to do what others do while traveling... "STARE". If you are really a shy person, you can stare at the fan and the ceiling, then stare the lights, stare the bedsheets or the footwears. Remember, you have to be expressionless. In the day time you always have the option to stare outside the window. If you are not a shy person keep staring at people around you or listen to random conversations in order to survive. The length of staring is directly proportional to the length of journey. If you are talkative, well then, congratulations, you are at the right place. Conversations are the best and the worst part of a long journey. Either they give you memories to cherish or to regret. Choose wisely!

 So, while I was busy with my staring business…

"Do you stay here itself?" asked the lady

"Yes, I do. I am going back home".

"Nice. What do you do?"

"I  ............................."

 She smiled at me as if she was impressed about something. I really could not sense. The lady inquiring me was the mother of that little kid. She was wearing simple Indian attire, a salwar suit with uncared attitude. She looked sad, perplexed and disappointed.

 Since it was a night journey and I already had a tired schedule, I immediately climbed up to my berth to lie down. I could see the kid looking at me. Every time he saw me, I waved him. He repetitively climbed to the berth in front of me, looked me and got down. The process continued for few minutes after which his father got tired lifting him up and down. In this tiredness, his wife broke the silence.

"My son can't hear and speak. We just came from AIIMS." said the wife

"He can't even express when he is hungry. While we were coming, he sat in front of every stall to show his hunger. We were getting late for the train so could not stop." Said his husband

There was a pause on everyone's face. I tried to sleep but could not. The night passed.

 Early morning, my favourite handsome kiddo started his game all over again. Whenever I smiled and looked at him, he felt shy. He used to hide himself behind his mother. I was still processing his condition. I wished I could do something for him. I came down, when few passengers left. As soon as I came, his mother started her questionnaire. She had some thoughts and she was eager to clarify them.

"How do you manage to do so many things. I had a zeal in my life but now I don't have. From the time I heard about my younger son, life has become a struggle to me. I want to do a lot but I am not able to."

I smiled..."it’s OK. Struggle comes in different shapes and sizes to everyone. But if you lose the zeal how will your kids bring that energy? You seem disappointed about life but I think you should do whatever you want to. You should fulfil your dreams too. Don't give up. Regarding your younger son, he is already undergoing treatment. Science has gone so far I am sure he will get aids."

"Yes, you are right. Doctors are going to operate him and put a hearing aid inside his ear so that he can hear life-long. We hope it goes well. But I still dont know how will he speak?".

(For some, life is so difficult and we, who are bestowed with every necessity, cry over petty things. This cute little child will have a machine in his body throughout, I kept pondering.)

 "I have one more question. You are a science student, rite?" asked the mother

"Yes" I said

"My elder son does not want to study at all. What will he do if he does not study maths and science?"

I found her really adorable. She was behaving like my an innocent new born eager to know everything.

"I don't think one needs to study science to be successful in life. When I came out of my home in the real life, I witnessed thousands of other options. Trust me, my interest is in creativity, I would have chosen NIFT if had known this before. Engineers and Doctors are not the only professionals on this planet. There is much more to learn beyond science. Don't worry let him do what he wants to."

"But what if he doesn't study at all?"

"Umm...try to make studies interesting rather than boring. You can give him dare like study for one hour and play for two. In this way he will be interested in studies as well and will not take it as a burden. Don't force your children. Interest in study comes from within. Let them pursue whatever they like, slowly and eventually, they will have a clear mindset."

She became emotional. "I love my elder son too much. He is very innocent for this world. He trusts everyone. What will he do in this crazy world?"

"You are looking me, right? My mother was worried in the same way as you. But today I am able to tackle everything. I may not be perfect but I am learning from my mistakes. And if you think that your son will learn everything at home, then you are wrong. Let him face the world. He will himself experience and learn practically. You don't need to worry.”

The talk continued..politics..life goals..career..right age to marry…..

 As the journey was about to end, she asked my name and said "Today I met someone very important. Thank you. It was nice meeting you."

"It was nice meeting you too. Take care and please don't wry. Your both sons are as normal as everyone else. They are doing great. You just need to bring your energy back."

...........

Life will bring you many occasions to learn. You will meet many people. Some will impact you and you will impact some. But important is to learn and evolve. Life might give you many hardships. When you are over confident, think about someone higher than you.  Contrarily, when you are really disappointed, think about someone less privileged than you. Think about that little kid I met. He has everything but still nothing. His personality might attract people towards him in the near future but will pull pity and sympathy too. People may crowd around him but no one will ever replace his voids. I am happy I took that journey. I met people who are much stronger than me and are yet unaware about their strengths. I could feel the love and endless sacrifice of parents for their children. I don’t know why she called me an important person? I don’t even know my words brought her inner peace or not? I am satisfied I brought little smile on their faces.

It is said that God does everything for a reason and it is always for good. Meanwhile, I am still wondering over the reasons...

 "Not all of us can do great things but we can do small things with great love."

-MOTHER TERESA